The SAT, from my perspective

I woke up a good hour early. I sharpened pencils in the dark, put in new batteries in my TI89 calculator. I then proceeded to eat my multi grain cheerios. My dad drove me to the highschool down the street where I was to await and conquer my doom. The rooms were posted on the front window of the Main Office. I hugged my dad as if I were never going to see him again or as if I was going to leave the campus 3 and a half hours later, a changed woman. I did.
The actual SAT is all fun and games until someone forgets a calculator. I didn't. There were BOYS in a CLASSROOM with GIRLS in it. That was strange and I think as far as classrooms go, I prefer them to be lesbian. Wannabe men AKA teenage boy smells awkward and they sound like car engines. At anyrate the test was about to start and some dumbass forgot a calculator. The proctors found one for him and then another boy decided to announce he forgot one too. Little did he know he was just further proving that teenage male is a no go as far as evolution goes. We finished 3 sections, then 4, then 5, then 8, then 10. Then I went to the barn and wanted to shoot myself in the brain. I didn't even have to because it already exploded.

moral of the story: don't have kids so they don't have to take the SAT ever.

-George